Bodies in the Trunk

Having been involved in special effects and haunts for many years, we in the Matulich household have always been concerned with how many dead bodies can be stuffed into the trunks of our cars. I started off with an ’88 Lincoln Town Car, mostly held together with duct tape, which could hold the equivalent of at least four dead bodies. I have since moved up to an HHR which lets me stack cadavers like cordwood as long as the outrigger mirrors are clear. My wife Kit has a Dodge Charger. Its trunk can hold probably three dead bodies, more when the back seats are laid down.

I’ve had two dead body stories relating to her car in the last few weeks. I had to commute between two conventions last weekend in Cincinnati. My wife had a Victorian clothing talk at Millenicon while I had a book-signing stint at Horror-Hound five miles away. Once I made it to the Horror Hound hotel, I checked the trunk to discover the stackable plastic torsos my wife wanted for displaying her historical garb. I was disappointed that the ghouls and zombies surrounding me were not at all bothered by telling Kit over the phone that her bodies were still in the trunk.

The week after that, Kit was able to make a major purchase of rabbit suits for our costume shop. She called me on the way back from the warehouse, gleeful at the spectacle her car must be for passing drivers. The back seat was filled with a half-dozen grinning bunny heads. The detached fluffy bodies?

They were in the trunk.

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